Expert Feature - Diana Saxby - Grace the Day - Civil Celebrant

Diana Saxby, Grace the Day 

"What IS a Celebrant?" is one of the recurring questions since I started out, along with "So you are a Humanist?" and "Are you a Registrar?"

So, along with a smattering of public speaking accompanied by my trusty short presentation film, I welcome any opportunity to address these misconceptions, starting with what a Celebrant is NOT!

I am not a wedding planner

Wedding day co-ordination, seating plans etc are definitely the responsibility of the wedding planner or the venue co-ordinator and if these have not been addressed early on and a celebrant is asked to advise, then it may be wise to re-think who you have engaged for these priorities. As a trained celebrant I will only take responsibility at the venue for choreographing the entrance, exit and positioning of the bridal procession throughout the ceremony and officiating on the day by performing the ceremony as agreed with the bride and groom. While it's important to have a good working relationship with everyone involved, it's equally important that I don't tread on anyone's toes in the hope that they won't tread on mine. Everyone has a useful purpose and a valuable role to play which I respect.

I am not a Registrar

Celebrants offer alternatives to Church and Registry Office weddings and have a great deal more freedom than registrars, including the freedom to conduct ceremonies indoor and outdoors without a licence. Their ceremonies can contain religious or spiritual readings and music. A registrar is still required to legally register the marriage and authorise the marriage certificate in a simple and inexpensive visit to the local registry office, either before or after the ceremony. A celebrant ceremony will include all the meaningful exchanges of rings, vows and pledges and will finish with a blessing or reading which can be spiritual, religious or non-religious.

I am not a Humanist.

My own opinions are not reflected in the ceremony, which is designed entirely for the couple and no one else.

The ceremony script is written either for them or by them and their input, contribution and approval makes it totally bespoke and unique. My practice is to keep the script absolutely private and confidential until it is delivered on the day of the wedding. I have learnt from bitter experience not to work when a third party is present as my brief is taken from the couple and much of what is discussed is intimate and private until shared on the day. I will include any reading or vows which the couple choose as appropriate to reflect their own identity, beliefs and hopes for the future.

In my opinion, a good celebrant should be open-minded, flexible, adaptable, creative, articulate and a confident orator. They shouldn’t be bigoted or prejudiced, nor should they impose restrictions, particularly when working with other professionals, such as photographers and film-makers. A registrar or vicar may limit the number of photographs taken during a service and stipulate where a photographer should stand. I don't make stipulations and believe in working in harmony with others, so that we enhance each others work, not hinder it.

My previous work history included the organising of functions attended by the Royal Family and liaising with members of the Royal Household, so while I have knowledge and respect for protocol, I am neither bound nor restricted by it as a celebrant. I’ve valuable links with reputable professionals who I’m happy to recommend once I’ve worked with them and can personally endorse their work and professionalism. I also have links with a number of beautiful venues, some of which are private homes with large and beautiful gardens, and I'm listed as an approved supplier with a number of well known and well-kept secret venues in several counties.

A creative mind helps to visualise beautiful, elegant ceremonies in unusual and romantic settings and I am happy to suggest locations and venues from my portfolio when we meet personally to discuss planning the bespoke ceremony for two unique individuals. 

Diana Saxby is a Civil Celebrant and is the founder/owner of Grace the Day 

We work with Diana and have great pleasure in doing so and believe that Diana's ceremony services offer a really personal and unique element to your wedding day.  

You can contact Diana to discuss your own personal ceremony requirements 07760 110007 or email ceremonies@dianagrace.plus.com 

You can also visit Grace the Days website

Seaside and lime theme

Karen Evans of Karen Evans Designs took this idea and created a stunning centre piece design. Designed to look like an ice cream sundae, these stunning works of art had all those who walked into the room gasping with delight at the unique idea and beautiful range of colors.

The title of this entry was the theme request from a wedding that Bellissimo planned which took place at the East Cliff Hotel on Friday 19th June 2010. With the bridesmaids in stunning lime green dresses these colors were brought into the reception venue, and with the reception suite looking directly over the sea this theme was also incorporated throughout the suite.

Centre pieces

(Image courtesy of Karen Evans Designs)

(Image courtesy of Amanda Clay Photography)

Brides Bouquet

(Image courtesy of Karen Evans Designs)

WOW Ceremonies Dorset

(Image courtesy of www.beau-coup.com)

(Image courtesy of www.examiner.com)

(Image courtesy of www.chocostudio.com)

Last month we had the pleasure of being introduced to Heather Downie - Retired Superintendent Registrar for Dorset - who now operates her own business under the name of Wow Ceremonies which offers a unique selection of personal ceremonies for all occasions all across Dorset and the surrounding areas. Who better to conduct an important ceremony for you than the former Superintendent Registrar. Heather is extremely passionate about her new business and is very experienced in what she does.

Here at Bellissimo we think this is a brilliant idea. Perhaps you wish to have the legal element of your marriage conducted in private on a small scale and then have an outdoor ceremony to celebrate with friends and family? Perhaps you have always dreamed of "getting married" in the New Forest. Well now you can! We all know that the UK laws prevent the actual legal marriage taking place outside or in a clearing in the Forest for example but if you had the legal marriage ceremony first then you could have a private ceremony which Heather could write for you personally conducted wherever you like. Heather will happily work with you to help you write the words if you have some ideas of your own.

Somewhere else where we feel this will prove popular is with couples who go abroad to marry and then come back and want to involve their family in friends in the marriage and post marriage celebrations. Well, having a ceremony when you return to the UK followed by a wedding reception can make your family all feel part of your special day - even if they were not there for the legal marriage. A personal service will be written to make it very special and can actually be more emotional and certainly more personal that the legal marriage itself.

There is so much scope here and we firmly believe that ceremonies for baby welcoming or naming ceremonies will grow hugely in popularity as an alternative to religious christenings. You can still select "god parents" or guardians for your baby who can still make commitments to you and your baby for their future.

Heather can be contacted by email on info@wow-ceremonies.co.uk or by telephone on 01300 321709 and she will be pleased to discuss any ceremony requirements which you may have.

Why not speak to Bellissimo to put together a celebration for you including the services of Heather Downie - call now to discuss your requirements be it for wedding, baby naming, special birthday celebration, milestone anniversary celebration, renewal of vows. Whatever you have in mind - we will be glad to speak to you and meet with you for a complimentary consultation

Mothers Day Cupcakes

We have just taken delivery of several boxes of beautiful Mothers Day cupcakes ready for tomorrow - courtesy of Simply Cupcakes based in Dorset www.simplycup-cakes.co.uk. Think there will be some very happy mums out there tomorrow. Clare from Simply Cupcakes is just one of the local businesses who will be exhibiting at our Wedding Open Day on Sunday 25th April which is taking place at The Carlton Hotel Bournemouth between 10am and 4pm. Come meet Clare and all of the other exhibitors